April 17, 2005

Cowboy Poetry Week

You heard it first, right here, ya'll.  This week is Cowboy Poetry Week.  You think I'm like a horse needin' to go out to pasture?  Not me.  Take off your hat and kick off your boots because Cowboy Poetry Week is here!

And to honor this celebration, I bring to you a most amazing poem that I'm sure will bring back fond memories for many of you regarding baths as a youngun.  I especially like the part about the squealing hog.  Reminds me of the movie "Deliverance."  Enjoy, ya'll!

Ma's Old Galvanized Washtub

Did you ever take your Saturday Bath
An' try to wash an' scrub,
While squattin' down on your haunches
In a galvanized washing tub?
If not, then you ain't missed a thing.
But now I'm telling' you what's right.
I done it 'til I wuz almost grown
An' every doggone Saturday night!
In summer it was bad enuff
But, in winter it was rough.
Spreading papers, buckets and kettles
An all of that sort of stuff.
Getting ready for that ordeal
Was only half the rub
Of takin' a bath on Saturday night
In a galvanized washin' tub.
Did you ever stand there stripped to the skin,
A wood stove bakin' your hide,
A dreadin' to put your dern foot in
Fer Fear you'd be burned alive?
Finally you'd git th' temperature right
An' into th' tub you'd crawl.
That cold steel 'ud touch your back
An' you'd squeal like a fresh stuck hog!
Then you'd get outa the tub next to the stove
And stand there drippin' and shakin'.
The front of your body is freezing to death
While the back of your body is bakin'.
Shiverin' 'n' shakin', burnin' 'n' bakin',
That's the awful price I had to pay.
That awful ordeal'll haunt me'
Until I'm old and gray.
I ain't done yet?there's something' else
That I've been wantin' to say.'
I wuz the youngest of all us kids
Who bathed on Saturday.
We all bathed accordin' to age
And I fell last in order,
Which meant I had to wash myself
In their dad-blamed dirty water.
Now, I'm a guy (gal) o'clean habits
And believe in a bath a week.
It helps to keep me healthy
And freshen my physique.
But if I had my druthers,
I'd rather eat a bug
Than to take my Saturday bath
In a galvanized washin' tub!

Author Unknown